


The Empress and the President

by orphan_account



Series: shitty stories that will give you tumors [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, F/F, Yuri, i love mean gurlz XD, im so proud of myself
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-17
Updated: 2016-08-22
Packaged: 2018-08-09 09:42:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7796917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Feferi is finally the Empress.<br/>And she meets the love of her life.<br/>With her moirail's help, she decides to woo the woman she desires.<br/>Hillary Clinton</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Feferi was at some political thing that nobody cares about the sea-tails for (SEE WHAT I DID THERE XDDDDDDD)  
And suddenly, she made eye contact with someone...  
Feferi realized that this amazing  
No, that this perfect woman...  
They were destined to be together forever.  
After the politics thing that nobody gives a shit about, Feferi rushed home and called her moirail.  
"Hey Eridan-Chan!"  
"OMG yes feferi-chan?"  
"LIIKE OHHH MY GOSH i have to liiike tell someone but brb I toootallly need a ciggie right now. Once Im finished with my smoke I'll toooootally tell you."  
"Alright, gurl. OOOOMG im SOOO like TOTES excited lol!"  
"Alright tell u in a minute LOL XD"  
feferi went and smoked a ciggie and saw that perfect woman; Hillary Clinton.  
She wanted to talk to her but..,.She was so SHY  
so hse went back on the phone where Eridan was still waiting  
"OHHH MY GOSH ERIDAN-CHAN-SAN-SENPAI-KUN-SAMA I TOTES HAVE A CRUSH ON HILLARY CLINTON!!1"  
"Hilary cliton?! BUT SHES TOTES THE MOST POPUULAR GURL IN SKOOL! OMG I WILL TOTES HELP U!1! but first i need a ciggie bc u got one too LOL XD BRB! XD"  
The Empress sat and waited for her moirail and she heard a knock at her door.  
She opened it and it was Eridan.  
"OMG I lied I dont need a ciggie right now I just totes needed to help you!" He said happily  
"OHH MY GOD THANK U LETS HJAVE A SLEPOVERR" Fefeir said happily  
and then they did each odders nails and makeup and went to skool.  
Hillary was talking to the popular crew.  
Donald Trump walked up and punched Eridan bc Donad is bullie and eridna is weak lil weenie  
"By the powahz of SUGOINESS I WILL END U FOR HURTING MY MATESPRIT" said none other than......  
HINATA HARUKA THE QUEEN OF KAWAII SUGOINESS.  
The goddes blasted Donald Trump and KILD HIM AND HILLARY SAID "thank u u can hang out wit da popular crew since u are TOTES amazing 4 making me president"  
Hinata smiled and said, "Come on Eridan-Kun!11"  
Eridan said "Cmon Fefeirchan we totes need to--"  
Hinata said "BUT I HATE FEFFEFEFEFERI CAHN!111"  
eridan said "its fine she wont make eye contact with you."  
Feferi still regretted the day she called Hinata a baka. Since then, her moirailegence wiht Eridanhas never been the same.  
"r u feferi peixes" said a voice  
Feferi looked up and realized......................................  
HILLARY CLINTON WAS TALKING TO HER!


	2. Chapter 2

"o."  
"M."  
"GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG" feferi squealed with delight  
HILLARY CLINTON WAS TALKING TO HER!  
"OMG i forgot that i still need that ciggie." eridan said and left the room to smoke  
"HILLARY CAN WE GET MARRID?!?!?!??!??!" feferi asked  
hilary replid "Yes. We can."  
And then Sollux walked in and said "GUYS SOMEONE WAS MURDERED!!11!!!!11!!11"  
eferi looked and saw who died.......................................................................  
She locked eyes with the dead body of......................  
..............................................................  
......................................................................................................................................................................  
......................................................................................................  
.......................................................................................................  
Eridan Ampora!  
"OMG!111 NOT MY BESTIE IM SO SAD" feferi waield as she mourned the death of eridna.  
liek ifu cri evritim

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SAD I KNOW :((((((  
> at least feferi and hillary got together XD  
> pls tel me what u thot abot this cathper lol


	3. Chapter 3

"a corpse has been found go investigatt" mokuma says bc hes in this fanfic as well XD  
feferi couldnt help but be sad but with hillary by her side, eridan's murderer will be FOUND and eridna wil lbe AVENGED.  
atfer investigating 4 ourz dey at da triel and fefeir gvae the first piece of evidece  
"There was a ciggie at the crim seen eirdna doesnt smok so the killer must! that means..."  
"its eitrhe soluc, krakta or dav! not me or hilary bc were perfect lmao XD"  
B R E A K  
"wait ! i knqo hwo hte killre iz!!1! it only mkaes sens htat its trump bc hes jelly of eredna's fashun sens!" says hinata, still cryign ovr4e hre mattsprittteees deth.  
"SORE WA CHIGAU YO" said koameda bc hes also hear  
"trump is dead. hinat killd him. no not hinat-kun hes my boyfriend i meen eridnnna's matsprite aka the shittey oc lmao hope hope hoep hope hope hopeh hpeohpeohpeohpe-!11111"  
"i knwo waht hapended!!" fefrei finaly said  
"so eridna went outsid awya from hte groop and then the killer wnet up and satbed him and left him ded and hten soluz saw eridnas corpse and alreted us..."  
"the only preson hwo culd have dun that was.................................."  
"U. BERNIE SANDERS."  
"bernie how culd u" hilary said in disbeleafyishere  
bernie explained "BECAUSE..........."  
"BOKU NO PICO"  
"fair enough now die lmao" monokumu said adn ekcsecyooted bernernb  
feferi atched and felt happ htat eridedenaz deth was avenjjjd  
adn hshe kisd hilary anfd they gto marid finaly but 2 bad erifdna culdnt attend the wedding ;-;  
"fefeir wil u go on datte with me?"  
fefreri gapsed!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i finALY GOT A BETTA REDR 4 DIS STROY IM SOOOOOO HAPP!11!!  
> anywhyz YA THER MERID NOw!11  
> nxet cahtper they wil go on date. RIP eridna tho lmao XD  
> ((i have no idea what happened to the plot of this story))


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> skool strated 4 my last beta reader so my frend agred 2 beta ti 4 me! lmao!

"so weredo u watn go?" hialry assed fref  
"hmmm idk hoe abut mcdonads?" fefr said  
hilary sed "ya i culd go 4 sum mccdonnadz"  
adn htey ejied brugers and hilrey sayed "so hwos life?"  
ferrari slated "oh its good. my miorial is ded tho but taht was soooo two captors ago."  
"lol ikr" said hilary as she eated her burgure  
hilery puled aut a dimad rign adn sed "fefrefi iwll u mary me and bcome hte queen of illuminati?"  
fefrefefireferi gapsed!  
"yes!"


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> edgy

dey wer getign merid (w/out eridan but that was SO three chapters ago)  
and fefrei said "hilary u know what hthis needs"  
hilary is liek "what does this ned"  
freferi saied "it needs edge."  
and then hillary dies  
****  
hillary woke up 2 a famliar fase  
"eridan?" she said  
"hello hialry if u dotn no ur ded. fef mya kiln herslef so we gotsa svae her lets go!"  
adn they travleled dwon thro hte clods  
"HEY CLODS UR TRAVLEING THRU THE CLODS U CLODS" peridot yeld but nobdoy gvae a shit about her  
fafter a hole juroney htey finaly wetn dwon 2 erth adn freferifref huged hielrary hwen ehs relizd hse wuz aliv!11!!!  
"hey guys im still here." said eridan hwo had come back to lif as well  
"O M G U GUYS! WE R FINLY ALL BCACK TOGETHRE AS A FMALT!" fefr said hapil  
eridan said "omg u rite. lets all selebrat"  
and they all went to selebrat and that puts this stroy 2 a close.  
i hop u liked it. the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i finally finished this piece of shit and im so proud of myself

**Author's Note:**

> pls tell me if u like or not criticism is appreciatted but if U FLAM U DIE U PREP/POSER/UNGOFFIK/UNKAWAII BITVH!1111!


End file.
